IELTS Band 9 Essay About
Here we take a look at a band 9 ielts writing task 2 sample about “Some school leavers go travelling or work for a period of time before they go to university”. This sample then will be further analyzed for its vocabulary, grammar and format, so we see how it has qualified for such band score. We also suggest over 200 band 9 IELTS samples released in March 2025.
Sample Essay (Band 9)
Some school leavers go travelling or work for a period of time before they go to university. Do the advantages of this trend outweigh the disadvantages?
In recent years, an increasing number of school leavers have opted to take a gap year before commencing their tertiary education. While some argue that this period of travel or work experience delays academic progress, I firmly believe that the benefits far outweigh the drawbacks.
One of the most significant advantages of taking a gap year is the opportunity for personal development. Engaging in employment or international travel fosters self-reliance, adaptability, and cultural awareness—qualities that are invaluable in both academic and professional contexts. For instance, students who work during this period gain firsthand experience of workplace expectations, time management, and financial independence, all of which contribute to greater maturity when they eventually enter university.
Additionally, exposure to different cultures and environments can broaden an individual’s perspective, making them more open-minded and capable of critical thinking. These attributes are particularly beneficial in higher education, where analytical skills and independent thought are crucial. Moreover, students who work or travel often return to academia with a clearer sense of direction, which may enhance their academic performance as they are more motivated and focused on their chosen field of study.
Nevertheless, some critics argue that a gap year disrupts academic momentum, making it difficult for students to re-adapt to structured learning. They contend that an extended break from formal education could lead to a decline in cognitive retention, thereby placing students at a disadvantage when they resume their studies. However, this concern is largely mitigated when individuals engage in intellectually stimulating activities, such as volunteering or undertaking skill-based courses during their gap year.
In conclusion, while taking time off before university may pose certain challenges, the overall advantages, including enhanced maturity, career readiness, and a more defined academic trajectory, make it a highly beneficial endeavor. Provided that students use this time productively, a gap year can serve as a valuable investment in both their educational and professional futures.
Five Academic Words in the sample for Some school leavers go travelling or work for a period of time
Tertiary education /ˈtɜːrʃəri ˌɛdʒuˈkeɪʃən/
Sentence: Many countries prioritize investment in tertiary education to enhance workforce competitiveness.
Personal development /ˈpɜːrsənəl dɪˌvɛləpmənt/
Sentence: Engaging in self-reflection and lifelong learning plays a crucial role in personal development.
Self-reliance /ˌsɛlf rɪˈlaɪəns/
Sentence: Living alone in a foreign country fosters self-reliance and independence.
Cognitive retention /ˈkɒɡnɪtɪv rɪˈtɛnʃən/
Sentence: Regular revision and active learning techniques improve cognitive retention.
Academic performance /ˌækəˈdɛmɪk pərˈfɔːrməns/
Sentence: Sleep deprivation negatively impacts academic performance, reducing students’ ability to concentrate.
Five Advanced Grammatical Structures & Their Impact
Complex Sentences with Relative Clauses
Example: “For instance, students who work during this period gain firsthand experience of workplace expectations.”
Impact: Enhances clarity and demonstrates the ability to structure sophisticated ideas.
Cleft Sentence for Emphasis
Example: “It is through travel and work experience that students cultivate independence and adaptability.”
Impact: Strengthens the argument by emphasizing key benefits of a gap year.
Parallelism
Example: “Engaging in employment or international travel fosters self-reliance, adaptability, and cultural awareness.”
Impact: Improves coherence and readability by presenting ideas in a structured, balanced manner.
Subjunctive Mood for Hypothetical Situations
Example: “Provided that students use this time productively, a gap year can serve as a valuable investment.”
Impact: Demonstrates control over advanced conditional structures, adding depth to the analysis.
Passive Voice for Formality
Example: “This concern is largely mitigated when individuals engage in intellectually stimulating activities.”
Impact: Adds objectivity and academic tone, making the argument sound more authoritative.
Free IELTS Sample Essays with Answers PDF
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