IELTS Band 9 Essay About Some people believe that both individuals and society would benefit
Here we take a look at a band 9 ielts writing task 2 sample about “Some people believe that both individuals and society would benefit”. This sample then will be further analyzed for its vocabulary, grammar and format, so we see how it has qualified for such band score. We also suggest over 100 band 9 IELTS samples released in April 2025.
Sample Essay (Band 9)
Some people believe that both individuals and society would benefit if people had to work only 6 hours a day. Others disagree. What is your opinion?
The concept of reducing the standard workday to six hours has sparked considerable debate, with some suggesting that it could lead to improved well-being and greater societal harmony. Others, however, argue that this shift may compromise productivity and economic stability. In my opinion, while the idea has clear advantages for individuals, it must be implemented strategically to ensure that both personal and societal outcomes are positive.
Advocates of a shorter workday claim that it promotes better work-life balance, which is essential for mental and physical health. With more free time, employees can engage in leisure activities, pursue hobbies, or spend quality time with family, all of which contribute to higher life satisfaction. Additionally, reduced working hours may lower stress and burnout rates, potentially leading to fewer sick days and improved job performance in the long run.
From a societal perspective, this approach could help reduce unemployment, as more jobs may be created to cover the same number of working hours. It may also foster greater gender equality by enabling both parents to participate more equally in childcare and household responsibilities. Countries like Sweden and Japan have already experimented with shorter workdays, reporting increased employee happiness and even gains in efficiency.
However, critics argue that cutting daily work hours could negatively affect businesses that rely on continuous operations. In sectors like manufacturing, customer service, or healthcare, a reduction in employee hours might require hiring more staff, leading to higher operational costs. Moreover, there is a risk that reduced hours could lead to decreased output, especially in highly competitive industries, thus hindering economic growth.
In conclusion, I believe that a six-hour workday can offer substantial benefits, particularly for individual well-being and social development. However, it should be adopted gradually and selectively, considering the nature of each industry and the broader economic context. A flexible, evidence-based approach is key to ensuring that this policy is not only desirable but also sustainable.
📘 Academic Vocabulary in the sample for Some people believe that both individuals and society would benefit
Debate /dɪˈbeɪt/
The idea of universal basic income is a topic of ongoing debate.
✅ There is intense debate about the effects of automation on employment.Productivity /ˌprɒd.ʌkˈtɪv.ə.ti/
Improving employee productivity is a priority for most organizations.
✅ Flexible work hours can actually enhance overall productivity.Outcome /ˈaʊt.kʌm/
The outcome of the policy change is still uncertain.
✅ Educational investments often lead to better long-term outcomes.Satisfaction /ˌsæt.ɪsˈfæk.ʃən/
Job satisfaction is closely linked to employee retention.
✅ Higher wages do not always guarantee greater satisfaction.Hinder /ˈhɪn.dər/
Excessive regulation may hinder innovation and market growth.
✅ A poor work environment can hinder employee performance.
✅ Advanced Grammar Structures
Complex Sentences with Subordinate Clauses
“While the idea has clear advantages for individuals, it must be implemented strategically…”
➤ Adds depth by showing contrast and conditional reasoning in one sentence.
Passive Voice
“Countries like Sweden and Japan have already been experimented with…”
➤ Adds formality and removes the agent to keep focus on the action.
Relative Clauses
“…free time, which contribute to higher life satisfaction.”
➤ Enhances coherence and links ideas naturally.
Modal Verbs for Suggestion and Necessity
“It should be adopted gradually and selectively…”
➤ Expresses recommendation and caution, useful for tone in opinion essays.
Conditionals
“If implemented without planning, a shorter workday could lead to reduced output.”
➤ Allows exploration of hypothetical outcomes, showing analytical depth.
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