Professional workers paid more than famous athletes

IELTS Band 9 Essay About professional workers should be paid more than famous athletes or entertainers

Here we take a look at a band 9 ielts writing task 2 sample about “Professional workers paid more than famous athletes”. This sample then will be further analyzed for its vocabulary, grammar and format, so we see how it has qualified for such band score. We also suggest over 100 band 9 IELTS sample released in 2024.

Short Explanation about Professional workers paid more than famous athletes

The disparity in salaries between professional workers, such as doctors and teachers, and famous athletes or entertainers often sparks heated debate. Proponents of higher pay for professionals argue that their contributions to society, such as saving lives or educating future generations, are far more impactful. Conversely, supporters of high earnings for celebrities claim their income reflects the revenue they generate through entertainment and media. This question ultimately revolves around societal values and economic dynamics, where the significance of a profession does not always align with its monetary reward. A balanced analysis can help address this complex issue.

Band 9 Sample Answer

Some people believe that professional workers such as doctors and teachers should be paid more than famous athletes or entertainers.

Do you agree or disagree?

The issue of whether professional workers, such as doctors and teachers, should earn more than athletes and entertainers is a contentious topic. While I acknowledge the economic factors that drive high earnings in the entertainment industry, I firmly believe that professionals who contribute to societal well-being deserve greater financial recognition.

To begin with, the importance of professional workers in society cannot be overstated. Doctors save lives daily, often working under immense pressure in life-or-death situations. Similarly, teachers shape future generations, fostering knowledge and critical thinking skills essential for societal progress. Despite their indispensable roles, their remuneration often fails to reflect the level of responsibility and skill required. For instance, in many countries, teachers struggle to make ends meet, which can discourage talented individuals from pursuing such careers. Increasing their salaries would not only acknowledge their contributions but also attract and retain skilled professionals.

Conversely, athletes and entertainers earn high salaries primarily due to market demand and their ability to generate significant revenue. For example, a successful film or sporting event can bring in millions through ticket sales, advertising, and sponsorships. While their work requires talent and dedication, it is often more focused on personal gain rather than altruistic service to society. Moreover, the disproportionate emphasis on entertainment can perpetuate a culture where superficial achievements are rewarded more than substantive contributions.

That said, I do not advocate for drastically reducing the income of athletes or entertainers, as their earnings are linked to the economy they operate in. However, governments and organizations should consider implementing policies to ensure fairer compensation for professionals. For instance, tax incentives for healthcare and education sectors could provide financial support without disrupting market dynamics.

In conclusion, while the entertainment industry’s high salaries reflect its commercial success, professional workers like doctors and teachers merit higher pay due to their critical societal impact. By rebalancing the compensation structure, society can better align financial rewards with the true value of different professions, fostering equity and long-term progress.

Total = 329 Words

Academic Words in the sample of Professional workers paid more than famous athletes (5 Examples)

1. Contentious
   • /kənˈtenʃəs/
   • Sentence: The proposed policy changes remain a contentious issue among lawmakers.
2. Indispensable
   • /ˌɪndɪˈspɛnsəbl/
   • Sentence: Good leadership is indispensable for the success of any organization.
3. Acknowledgment
   • /əkˈnɒlɪdʒmənt/
   • Sentence: Public acknowledgment of her efforts boosted her morale significantly.
4. Altruistic
   • /ˌæltruˈɪstɪk/
   • Sentence: His altruistic actions, such as volunteering at shelters, earned him widespread admiration.
5. Disproportionate
   • /ˌdɪsprəˈpɔːʃənɪt/
   • Sentence: The disproportionate allocation of funds to urban areas has exacerbated rural poverty.

Advanced Grammar Structures in the sample for Professional workers paid more than famous athletes

1. Complex Sentences with Concessive Clauses
   • Example: “While I acknowledge the economic factors that drive high earnings in the entertainment industry, I firmly believe that professionals who contribute to societal well-being deserve greater financial recognition.”
   • Impact: Shows balance by presenting both sides of the argument in a sophisticated way.
2. Use of Modal Verbs for Recommendations
   • Example: “Governments and organizations should consider implementing policies to ensure fairer compensation for professionals.”
   • Impact: Demonstrates the ability to make suggestions clearly and appropriately.
3. Use of Passive Voice
   • Example: “Their remuneration often fails to reflect the level of responsibility and skill required.”
   • Impact: Shifts focus to the issue of unfair pay, enhancing the formal tone.
4. Conditional Sentences
   • Example: “If governments introduced tax incentives, it could provide financial support without disrupting market dynamics.”
   • Impact: Adds complexity by presenting hypothetical solutions.
5. Nominalization
   • Example: “Increasing their salaries would not only acknowledge their contributions but also attract and retain skilled professionals.”
   • Impact: Creates a formal and academic tone, improving lexical resource.

Writing Format and Band 9 Features

1. Clear Introduction: The introduction directly addresses the question and states the writer’s position.
2. Balanced Analysis: Both perspectives are discussed comprehensively, with examples to support key arguments.
3. Sophisticated Vocabulary: Academic words are used appropriately and naturally throughout the essay.
4. Logical Cohesion: Each paragraph flows seamlessly into the next, supported by cohesive devices.
5. Strong Conclusion: The essay ends with a clear and reasoned opinion, summarizing the main points effectively.

By addressing all task requirements, maintaining formal tone, and demonstrating advanced language use, this sample achieves a Band 9.

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