IELTS Band 9 Essay About Some people think that success of life is based on hard work and
Here we take a look at a band 9 ielts writing task 2 sample about “Some people think that success of life is based on hard work and”. This sample then will be further analyzed for its vocabulary, grammar and format, so we see how it has qualified for such band score. We also suggest over 200 band 9 IELTS samples released in 2025.
Sample Answer (Band 9)
Some people think that success of life is based on hard work and determination. Others, however, believe that there are more important factors such as having money or good appearance.
Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.
Success in life is often attributed to hard work and determination, as they are considered fundamental traits that lead to achievement. However, some argue that external factors, such as financial stability or physical attractiveness, play a more crucial role. This essay will discuss both perspectives before presenting my own view.
On the one hand, those who emphasize perseverance and diligence argue that success is rarely the result of mere luck or natural advantages. Many self-made individuals, such as entrepreneurs and scientists, have demonstrated that consistent effort and a strong work ethic are indispensable in overcoming challenges. For instance, figures like Thomas Edison, who conducted thousands of experiments before inventing the light bulb, exemplify the power of resilience. Moreover, in competitive fields such as business or academia, individuals who persist despite failures often surpass those who rely solely on their innate abilities. Therefore, it is reasonable to conclude that sustained effort is a primary determinant of success.
On the other hand, some contend that factors like wealth and aesthetic appeal significantly enhance an individual’s prospects. Financial resources, for example, grant access to high-quality education, influential networks, and business opportunities, all of which can accelerate career advancement. Similarly, physical attractiveness can influence certain industries, such as entertainment or fashion, where appearance is a competitive advantage. Additionally, psychological studies suggest that attractive individuals may receive preferential treatment in social and professional settings, reinforcing the notion that success is sometimes dictated by elements beyond one’s control.
In my opinion, while external factors may provide an initial advantage, they are insufficient without tenacity and self-discipline. A wealthy person who lacks ambition may fail, whereas a determined individual with limited resources can eventually thrive. Hard work ensures that individuals develop essential skills, adapt to changing circumstances, and maintain a sense of purpose—qualities that neither money nor looks can guarantee. Hence, although factors like wealth and beauty may serve as catalysts, long-term success is ultimately dependent on personal effort and resilience.
5 Academic Words with Pronunciation and Example Sentences
Perseverance /ˌpɜː.sɪˈvɪə.rəns/
- Example: Achieving fluency in a new language requires perseverance, as progress is often slow.
Resilience /rɪˈzɪl.jəns/
- Example: Despite facing multiple setbacks, she showed resilience and eventually succeeded in her career.
Primary determinant /ˈpraɪ.mər.i dɪˈtɜː.mɪ.nənt/
- Example: Education is often seen as a primary determinant of an individual’s professional success.
Tenacity /tɪˈnæs.ə.ti/
- Example: The scientist’s tenacity in conducting experiments led to a groundbreaking discovery.
Catalyst /ˈkæt.əl.ɪst/
- Example: The invention of the internet served as a catalyst for global digital transformation.
5 Advanced Grammar Structures and How They Enhance the Essay
Complex Sentences with Subordinate Clauses
- Example: “Many self-made individuals, such as entrepreneurs and scientists, have demonstrated that consistent effort and a strong work ethic are indispensable in overcoming challenges.”
- This structure enhances coherence and sophistication by linking ideas logically.
Relative Clauses
- Example: “Figures like Thomas Edison, who conducted thousands of experiments before inventing the light bulb, exemplify the power of resilience.”
- This improves clarity and specificity by adding extra information about the subject.
Passive Voice
- Example: “Success in life is often attributed to hard work and determination.”
- Using the passive voice makes the writing more formal and emphasizes the idea rather than the subject.
Parallelism
- Example: “Hard work ensures that individuals develop essential skills, adapt to changing circumstances, and maintain a sense of purpose—qualities that neither money nor looks can guarantee.”
- Parallel structure improves readability and strengthens the argument by maintaining a rhythmic flow.
Conditional Sentences
- Example: “A wealthy person who lacks ambition may fail, whereas a determined individual with limited resources can eventually thrive.”
- This conditional sentence adds depth by illustrating contrasting scenarios, which is effective in analytical writing.
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