IELTS Band 9 Essay About Some people believe that employers should not be concerned
Here we take a look at a band 9 ielts writing task 2 sample about “Some people believe that employers should not be concerned”. This sample then will be further analyzed for its vocabulary, grammar and format, so we see how it has qualified for such band score. We also suggest over 200 band 9 IELTS samples released in March 2025.
Sample Essay (Band 9)
Some people believe that employers should not be concerned about the way their employees dress, but what they should be concerned about is their employees’ quality of work.
To what extent do you agree or disagree?
In today’s increasingly diverse workplaces, the debate surrounding appropriate attire remains a contentious issue. While some argue that employers should strictly enforce dress codes, I firmly believe that an employee’s performance and overall contribution to the company should take precedence over their appearance. This essay will outline the rationale behind this viewpoint.
First and foremost, the primary function of any employee is to deliver results. In most professions—especially in sectors such as technology, research, or the arts—creativity, efficiency, and innovation are far more critical than physical appearance. Imposing rigid dress codes may actually hinder productivity by forcing employees to conform to superficial standards rather than focusing on their core responsibilities. A programmer, for example, is not more effective in a suit than in casual clothing; it is their skills and problem-solving abilities that truly matter.
Moreover, prioritizing dress over performance can be seen as outdated, especially in a globalized era that values diversity and inclusivity. Encouraging a flexible dress policy demonstrates trust in employees and fosters a sense of autonomy. This can result in higher job satisfaction and better workplace morale, which are both positively correlated with increased productivity.
That said, there are certain professions—such as those in hospitality or law—where appearance does play a role in customer perception and trust. In such cases, maintaining a professional image may be necessary. However, even in these industries, the emphasis should remain on competence and service quality rather than rigid uniform standards.
In conclusion, while appearance can occasionally play a supporting role in professional environments, it should never overshadow an employee’s abilities or value to the organization. Employers would benefit far more by fostering a performance-oriented culture that prioritizes results over superficialities.
Five Academic Words in the sample for Some people believe that employers should not be concerned
Diverse /daɪˈvɜːs/
Workplaces today are becoming increasingly diverse in terms of culture and background.
Example: “A diverse team can bring a variety of perspectives to problem-solving.”Contribution /ˌkɒntrɪˈbjuːʃən/
Her contribution to the project was vital to its success.
Example: “Employee contributions should be recognized regardless of their attire.”Hinder /ˈhɪndə(r)/
Strict rules may hinder employee creativity.
Example: “Lack of freedom at work can hinder motivation.”Outdated /ˌaʊtˈdeɪtɪd/
The idea of enforcing strict dress codes is becoming outdated.
Example: “Outdated policies may discourage younger talent.”Performance /pəˈfɔːməns/
A company should reward employees based on performance, not appearance.
Example: “Performance reviews help identify top talent in an organization.”
Five Advanced Grammar Structures & Their Impact
Cleft Sentence
“It is their skills and problem-solving abilities that truly matter.”
Effect: Emphasizes the importance of ability over appearance; improves sentence focus and variety.
Complex Sentences with Subordinating Conjunctions
“While some argue that employers should strictly enforce dress codes, I firmly believe…”
Effect: Shows ability to contrast ideas clearly and logically.
Passive Voice
“Employees would benefit far more by fostering a performance-oriented culture…”
Effect: Adds objectivity and formality to the writing.
Modal Verbs for Speculation and Advice
“Rigid dress codes may actually hinder productivity…”
Effect: Shows cautious language and academic tone, important for IELTS Task 2.
Relative Clauses
“In such cases, maintaining a professional image may be necessary.”
Effect: Provides additional information smoothly; demonstrates grammatical range.
Free IELTS Sample Essays with Answers PDF
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