IELTS Band 9 Essay About In many countries more and more people want to study at university
Here we take a look at a band 9 ielts writing task 2 sample about “In many countries more and more people want to study at university”. This sample then will be further analyzed for its vocabulary, grammar and format, so we see how it has qualified for such band score. We also suggest over 200 band 9 IELTS samples released in March 2025.
Sample Essay (Band 9)
In many countries, more and more people want to study at university, so competing for places is increased.
Why do you think this happens?
Do you think competing for places is positive or negative development?
In many countries, the number of people aspiring to pursue higher education has been steadily increasing, resulting in heightened competition for university places. This phenomenon can be attributed to several factors, including the growing demand for skilled labor and the perception that a university degree is essential for career success. In this essay, I will explore the reasons behind this trend and discuss whether increased competition for university places is a positive or negative development.
One of the primary reasons for the surge in university applications is the rising demand for skilled professionals in the labor market. As economies become more advanced, the need for highly educated workers in fields such as technology, healthcare, and finance continues to grow. Many individuals view a university degree as a crucial step toward securing a well-paying and stable job. Moreover, higher education is often associated with better job prospects, career advancement, and personal development, which motivates people to invest in their education. For example, in fields like engineering or medicine, employers typically require candidates to hold a relevant degree, and without this qualification, individuals may struggle to find employment.
Furthermore, the perception that a university degree is a prerequisite for success in today’s competitive job market has fueled the desire to attend university. In many societies, there is a widespread belief that higher education is a ticket to upward social mobility and financial prosperity. As a result, many young people feel pressured to apply for university, even if they are unsure of their career path. This has led to an increase in the number of university applicants, further intensifying the competition for available spots.
However, while increased competition for university places may seem like a positive reflection of people’s ambition and desire for self-improvement, it also has its drawbacks. On the negative side, it can lead to stress and anxiety among students, who must compete with their peers for limited spots. Additionally, the increasing demand for university education has led to a saturation of degree holders in certain fields, resulting in a mismatch between the number of graduates and the number of available jobs. This has led to underemployment, where individuals with university degrees are working in jobs that do not require higher education, undermining the value of their qualifications.
In conclusion, the increasing desire to attend university is largely driven by the demand for skilled labor and the perception of higher education as a pathway to success. While this trend reflects the ambition of many individuals, it also creates challenges such as heightened competition, stress, and the potential for underemployment. In my opinion, while the competition itself is not inherently negative, it must be managed carefully to ensure that individuals are not pursuing degrees simply for the sake of social conformity or out of pressure, but rather as a genuine means of achieving personal and professional growth.
Academic Vocabulary in the sample for In many countries more and more people want to study at university
Skilled (skɪld)
Sentence: Skilled workers are in high demand in the tech industry.
Prerequisite (ˌpriːˈrɛkwɪzɪt)
Sentence: A strong understanding of mathematics is a prerequisite for studying engineering.
Ticket (ˈtɪkɪt)
Sentence: A well-written resume can be your ticket to landing a dream job.
Saturation (ˌsætʃəˈreɪʃən)
Sentence: The market is reaching saturation, and it is becoming difficult to find new customers.
Underemployment (ˌʌndərɪmˈplɔɪmənt)
Sentence: Many recent graduates are experiencing underemployment due to a mismatch between their qualifications and available job opportunities.
Advanced Grammar Structures
Complex Sentences
Example: “As economies become more advanced, the need for highly educated workers in fields such as technology, healthcare, and finance continues to grow.”
Explanation: This sentence uses a subordinate clause (“As economies become more advanced”) to provide additional context and explain the cause of the increase in demand for educated workers.
Relative Clauses
Example: “In many societies, there is a widespread belief that higher education is a ticket to upward social mobility and financial prosperity.”
Explanation: The relative clause “that higher education is a ticket to upward social mobility and financial prosperity” adds information to the subject of the sentence, making it more informative.
Modal Verbs for Suggestion
Example: “In my opinion, while the competition itself is not inherently negative, it must be managed carefully to ensure that individuals are not pursuing degrees simply for the sake of social conformity.”
Explanation: The modal verb “must” is used to show necessity, demonstrating the need for careful management of competition to avoid negative consequences.
Passive Voice
Example: “The increasing demand for university education has led to a saturation of degree holders in certain fields.”
Explanation: The passive voice shifts the focus away from the agent (those who are demanding the education) and emphasizes the result (saturation of degree holders), making the writing more formal.
Adverbial Phrases
Example: “This has led to underemployment, where individuals with university degrees are working in jobs that do not require higher education.”
Explanation: The adverbial phrase “where individuals with university degrees are working in jobs that do not require higher education” provides further explanation of the consequences of the situation described in the main clause.
How These Structures Contribute to a Higher Band Score:
Complex Sentences: The use of complex sentences helps express a range of ideas, making the essay more sophisticated and better suited to higher band scores.
Relative Clauses: These clauses add detail to the sentence, improving clarity and coherence, which is essential for a higher band score.
Modal Verbs for Suggestion: The use of modal verbs like “must” shows the ability to suggest solutions and convey recommendations in a formal tone, which enhances the overall quality of the argument.
Passive Voice: The passive voice is appropriate for formal writing and helps vary sentence structure, which is important for demonstrating a higher level of proficiency.
Adverbial Phrases: These phrases allow for more nuanced explanations and contribute to fluency, enhancing the overall readability and coherence of the essay.
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