A large amount of advertising aimed at children should be banned

IELTS Band 9 Essay About a large amount of advertising aimed at children should be banned

Here we take a look at a band 9 ielts writing task 2 sample about “A large amount of advertising aimed at children should be banned”. This sample then will be further analyzed for its vocabulary, grammar and format, so we see how it has qualified for such band score. We also suggest over 200 band 9 IELTS samples released in 2025.

Sample Essay (Band 9)

Nowadays a large amount of advertising aimed at children should be banned because of the negative effects.

To what extent do you agree or disagree?

The proliferation of advertising targeted at children has sparked a heated debate about its ethical implications. While some argue that such advertising is harmless and part of a free-market economy, others believe it has detrimental effects on children’s well-being and should be banned. In my opinion, a large portion of advertising aimed at children should indeed be restricted due to its negative influence on their behavior, health, and development.

One of the primary reasons for banning such advertising is its impact on children’s health. Many advertisements promote unhealthy food and beverages, such as sugary snacks and carbonated drinks, which contribute to the growing epidemic of childhood obesity. For example, studies have shown that children exposed to junk food ads are more likely to develop poor eating habits, leading to long-term health issues like diabetes and heart disease. By restricting these advertisements, governments can help promote healthier lifestyles among children.

Another significant concern is the manipulative nature of advertising aimed at children. Young children lack the cognitive ability to distinguish between entertainment and persuasive content, making them particularly vulnerable to marketing tactics. Advertisements often create a sense of urgency or desire for products, leading to unnecessary consumerism and financial strain on families. For instance, children may pester their parents to buy toys or gadgets they see advertised, causing stress and conflict within households. Banning such ads would protect children from these exploitative practices.

Furthermore, excessive exposure to advertising can have a negative impact on children’s mental health and self-esteem. Advertisements often promote unrealistic beauty standards or materialistic values, leading to feelings of inadequacy or low self-worth. For example, ads featuring idealized images of children can make others feel insecure about their appearance or social status. By limiting these advertisements, we can create a more inclusive and supportive environment for children to grow and thrive.

In conclusion, while advertising is an integral part of the modern economy, its targeting of children raises serious ethical and practical concerns. The negative effects on children’s health, behavior, and mental well-being justify the implementation of stricter regulations or even a ban on such advertising. Governments, parents, and educators must work together to protect children from the harmful influence of advertising and ensure their healthy development.

Academic Vocabulary in the sample for a large amount of advertising aimed at children should be banned

1. Proliferation (/prəˌlɪfəˈreɪʃən/)
   • Example: The proliferation of smartphones has changed the way we communicate.
   • Meaning: Rapid increase or spread.
2. Detrimental (/ˌdɛtrɪˈmɛntəl/)
   • Example: Pollution has a detrimental effect on marine life.
   • Meaning: Causing harm or damage.
3. Epidemic (/ˌɛpɪˈdɛmɪk/)
   • Example: The epidemic of obesity is a major public health concern.
   • Meaning: A widespread occurrence of a particular phenomenon.
4. Manipulative (/məˈnɪpjʊlətɪv/)
   • Example: Some advertisements use manipulative tactics to influence consumers.
   • Meaning: Seeking to control or influence others in an unfair or deceptive way.
5. Cognitive (/ˈkɒɡnɪtɪv/)
   • Example: Early childhood is a critical period for cognitive development.
   • Meaning: Related to the mental processes of understanding and learning.

1. Advanced Grammar Structures and Their Contribution to a Higher Band Score:

   • Conditional Sentences (Second Conditional):
     • Example: “If governments banned advertising aimed at children, it could significantly improve their health.”
     • Contribution: Demonstrates the ability to discuss hypothetical situations, which is a marker of advanced language proficiency.
   • Passive Voice:
     • Example: “Children are often targeted by manipulative advertising campaigns.”
     • Contribution: Shifts focus to the action rather than the subject, adding variety and sophistication to the writing.
   • Relative Clauses:
     • Example: “Advertisements that promote unhealthy foods contribute to childhood obesity.”
     • Contribution: Adds complexity to sentences and provides additional information without breaking the flow.
   • Cleft Sentences:
     • Example: “What needs to be addressed is the harmful impact of advertising on children.”
     • Contribution: Emphasizes specific parts of the sentence, making the argument more persuasive and nuanced.
   • Inversion for Emphasis:
     • Example: “Not only does advertising affect children’s health, but it also influences their self-esteem.”
     • Contribution: Adds a formal tone and highlights key points, which is essential for achieving a higher band score.

Format and Features of a Band 9 Essay:

1. Clear Introduction: The introduction presents the topic and the writer’s opinion in a concise manner.
2. Coherent Paragraphs: Each paragraph focuses on a single idea, supported by examples and explanations.
3. Academic Vocabulary: The use of advanced and varied vocabulary enhances the quality of the essay.
4. Complex Grammar Structures: The inclusion of advanced grammar structures demonstrates a high level of language proficiency.
5. Strong Conclusion: The conclusion summarizes the main points and restates the writer’s opinion effectively.

By adhering to these features, the essay achieves clarity, coherence, and sophistication, contributing to a Band 9 score.

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