IELTS Band 9 Essay About In some countries more and more fathers take care of their children
Here we take a look at a band 9 ielts writing task 2 sample about “In some countries more and more fathers take care of their children”. This sample then will be further analyzed for its vocabulary, grammar and format, so we see how it has qualified for such band score. We also suggest over 200 band 9 IELTS samples released in 2025.
Sample Answer (Band 9)
In some countries, more and more fathers take care of their children at home, while mothers work full-time.
What’s the reason for this?
Is it a positive or negative development?
In many societies, there has been a noticeable shift in gender roles, with an increasing number of fathers assuming primary caregiving responsibilities while mothers pursue full-time careers. Several socioeconomic and cultural factors contribute to this phenomenon, and while some may view it as a deviation from traditional norms, it ultimately represents a progressive transformation in modern family structures.
One of the primary reasons for this trend is the changing dynamics of the labor market. Many industries have become more inclusive, providing women with greater opportunities for career advancement. As a result, an increasing number of households are making decisions based on financial viability rather than adhering to conventional gender expectations. In some cases, women may have higher earning potential than their spouses, making it more pragmatic for fathers to stay at home. Furthermore, many countries have introduced policies that support paternity leave, enabling men to actively participate in childcare without jeopardizing their careers.
From a societal perspective, this shift can be viewed as a positive development. First, it challenges outdated gender stereotypes and promotes equality in domestic responsibilities. As fathers become more involved in their children’s upbringing, it fosters stronger familial bonds and contributes to the holistic development of children. Research suggests that children raised in households with engaged fathers tend to exhibit better emotional well-being and cognitive development. Additionally, by normalizing the idea of shared responsibilities, future generations may grow up with a more balanced perception of gender roles.
However, some argue that such a shift may have drawbacks. In certain cultures, men staying at home may still be perceived as socially unconventional, leading to potential stigmatization. Additionally, some fathers may struggle with the emotional and psychological challenges associated with full-time caregiving, especially if they lack sufficient social support.
In conclusion, the increasing number of stay-at-home fathers is largely driven by economic pragmatism and progressive gender norms. Despite certain cultural barriers, this transformation is, on the whole, a positive one, as it enhances gender equality, strengthens family relationships, and redefines societal expectations in a beneficial way.
5 Academic Words with Pronunciation and Example Sentences
Inclusive /ɪnˈkluːsɪv/
- Example: Many organizations are adopting more inclusive hiring practices to ensure diversity in the workplace.
Socioeconomic /ˌsəʊsɪəʊˌiːkəˈnɒmɪk/
- Example: The government must address the socioeconomic disparities that prevent equal access to education.
Pragmatic /præɡˈmætɪk/
- Example: A pragmatic approach to problem-solving often leads to more effective outcomes.
Cognitive /ˈkɒɡ.nɪ.tɪv/
- Example: Engaging in puzzles and strategic games enhances cognitive abilities.
Financial viability /faɪˈnænʃəl ˌvaɪəˈbɪl.ɪ.ti/
- Example: The success of a business largely depends on its financial viability in the long run.
5 Advanced Grammar Structures and How They Enhance the Essay
Complex Sentences with Subordinating Conjunctions
- Example: “As fathers become more involved in their children’s upbringing, it fosters stronger familial bonds and contributes to the holistic development of children.”
- Why it helps: It demonstrates a sophisticated way of connecting ideas, making the argument clearer and more cohesive.
Passive Voice
- Example: “In certain cultures, men staying at home may still be perceived as socially unconventional, leading to potential stigmatization.”
- Why it helps: It adds a formal and academic tone, which is essential for high-band writing.
Relative Clauses
- Example: “Research suggests that children raised in households with engaged fathers tend to exhibit better emotional well-being and cognitive development.”
- Why it helps: This structure provides additional information in a concise and natural way, improving fluency.
Parallel Structures
- Example: “Despite certain cultural barriers, this transformation is, on the whole, a positive one, as it enhances gender equality, strengthens family relationships, and redefines societal expectations in a beneficial way.”
- Why it helps: It creates rhythm and balance in writing, making the argument more persuasive.
Nominalization
- Example: “One of the primary reasons for this trend is the changing dynamics of the labor market.”
- Why it helps: Using nouns instead of verbs (“the changing dynamics” instead of “how the labor market changes”) makes the writing more formal and academically appropriate.
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