IELTS Band 9 Essay About shopping is not only about buying the goods you need
Here we take a look at a band 9 ielts writing task 2 sample about “shopping is not only about buying the goods you need”. This sample then will be further analyzed for its vocabulary, grammar and format, so we see how it has qualified for such band score. We also suggest over 200 band 9 IELTS samples released in 2025.
Sample Band 9 Answer
In most developed countries shopping is not only about buying the goods you need, it is also perceived as entertainment.
Is it a positive or negative development?
In most developed countries, shopping has transcended its traditional role of merely acquiring necessities and has become a form of entertainment. This phenomenon has sparked debates about whether it is a positive or negative development. In my opinion, while this trend has certain benefits, it also carries significant drawbacks that cannot be ignored.
On the one hand, viewing shopping as a form of entertainment can have positive implications for the economy and society. For instance, it stimulates consumer spending, which is a key driver of economic growth. Shopping malls and retail centers often serve as social hubs where people can gather, interact, and enjoy leisure activities, thereby fostering a sense of community. Additionally, the diversification of shopping experiences, such as themed stores or interactive displays, can enhance customer satisfaction and make the process more enjoyable.
On the other hand, the commercialization of shopping as entertainment has several negative consequences. One major issue is the promotion of consumerism, where individuals are encouraged to purchase goods they do not necessarily need. This can lead to excessive spending, financial strain, and even debt. Moreover, the environmental impact of increased consumption is a growing concern, as it contributes to resource depletion and waste generation. For example, the fast fashion industry, which thrives on the idea of shopping as entertainment, is notorious for its detrimental effects on the environment.
Furthermore, the psychological effects of this trend cannot be overlooked. The constant exposure to marketing strategies designed to entice consumers can lead to impulsive buying behavior and a materialistic mindset. Over time, this can erode personal values and create a culture where self-worth is tied to material possessions rather than meaningful achievements or relationships.
In conclusion, while the transformation of shopping into a form of entertainment has certain advantages, such as economic stimulation and enhanced social interactions, it also poses significant challenges. These include the promotion of consumerism, environmental degradation, and negative psychological impacts. Therefore, it is crucial for individuals and societies to strike a balance, ensuring that shopping remains a sustainable and fulfilling activity rather than a detrimental obsession.
5 Academic Vocabulary in the sample for shopping is not only about buying the goods you need
- Transcended (/trænˈsɛndɪd/)
- Example: The artist’s work has transcended cultural boundaries and gained international acclaim.
- Phenomenon (/fɪˈnɒmɪnən/)
- Example: The rise of social media is a phenomenon that has transformed communication.
- Diversification (/daɪˌvɜːsɪfɪˈkeɪʃən/)
- Example: The diversification of investment portfolios reduces financial risk.
- Commercialization (/kəˌmɜːʃəlaɪˈzeɪʃən/)
- Example: The commercialization of sports has led to increased revenue but also ethical concerns.
- Detrimental (/ˌdɛtrɪˈmɛntəl/)
- Example: Lack of sleep can have detrimental effects on both physical and mental health.
5 Advanced Grammar Structures and Their Impact on Band Score
- Conditional Sentences (If-Clauses):
- Example: “If individuals are not cautious, the trend of shopping as entertainment can lead to financial problems.”
- Impact: Demonstrates the ability to discuss hypothetical situations, which is essential for higher-level arguments.
- Passive Voice:
- Example: “Shopping malls are often designed to provide a complete entertainment experience.”
- Impact: Adds formality and objectivity to the writing, which is crucial for academic tone.
- Comparative Structures:
- Example: “Shopping as entertainment is more enjoyable but less sustainable than traditional shopping.”
- Impact: Shows the ability to compare and contrast ideas effectively.
- Complex Sentences with Subordinate Clauses:
- Example: “While shopping as entertainment has economic benefits, it also poses significant environmental challenges.”
- Impact: Enhances coherence and cohesion by linking ideas logically.
- Modal Verbs for Speculation:
- Example: “This trend could lead to a culture where material possessions are overvalued.”
- Impact: Demonstrates the ability to speculate and discuss possibilities, which is key for nuanced arguments.
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