IELTS Band 9 Essay About Nowadays celebrities are more famous

Here we take a look at a band 9 ielts writing task 2 sample about “Nowadays celebrities are more famous for their glamour and wealth”. This sample then will be further analyzed for its vocabulary, grammar and format, so we see how it has qualified for such band score. We also suggest over 100 band 9 IELTS sample released in 2024.

Explanation about Nowadays celebrities are more famous for their glamour and wealth

In recent years, celebrities seem to be more famous for their wealth and glamorous lifestyles than for their professional achievements. This shift in focus has led to the concern that young people may be influenced by these superficial qualities, rather than valuing hard work and success in their respective fields. While some argue that the media plays a significant role in promoting this image of celebrities, others believe that it is essential for the youth to distinguish between fame and true accomplishment. This essay will discuss both sides and give an opinion on the matter.

Sample IELTS Writing Task 2 Answer

Nowadays celebrities are more famous for their glamour and wealth than for their achievements, and this sets a bad example to young people.

To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?

In today’s society, it is often the case that celebrities are more admired for their wealth and glamorous lifestyles than for their achievements. This shift in public perception has raised concerns about the negative impact it may have on younger generations. While I agree that this trend is problematic, I also believe that it is essential for young people to be taught to look beyond the surface and recognize the value of hard work and personal accomplishment.

One argument in favor of the statement is that media outlets and social platforms often place excessive focus on the luxury and fame surrounding celebrities, rather than on their talents or contributions. Celebrities are frequently portrayed as living extravagant lives, showcasing expensive possessions and vacations. This constant exposure to a glamorous lifestyle can create unrealistic expectations for young people, leading them to prioritize superficial qualities like wealth and appearance over personal development and achievements. As a result, young individuals may find it more appealing to pursue fame rather than focusing on education or career growth.

However, there are also those who argue that celebrities’ success can inspire young people to strive for greatness in their chosen fields. For instance, many famous individuals have achieved remarkable success through dedication and talent, such as actors, athletes, and entrepreneurs. Their accomplishments can serve as an example of how hard work and perseverance can lead to fame and fortune. Moreover, the visibility of celebrities can encourage young people to pursue their passions, whether in the arts, sports, or business, by showing them that success is attainable with the right mindset and effort.

In my opinion, while celebrities may be more frequently associated with wealth and glamour, it is important to recognize that their achievements often come from years of hard work. Therefore, rather than focusing solely on the superficial aspects of fame, young people should be taught to value the dedication and skills that lead to success. By promoting a culture of merit and accomplishment, we can help the next generation understand that true success is not just about wealth or appearance, but about the impact one makes through their work.

In conclusion, while the media often highlights the glamorous lives of celebrities, it is crucial to emphasize the importance of genuine accomplishments. By teaching young people to value hard work and dedication, we can encourage them to pursue meaningful success rather than idolizing wealth and glamour.

Academic Vocabulary in the sample for Nowadays celebrities are more famous for their glamour and wealth

1. Extravagant (ɪkˈstrævəɡənt)
   • Sentence: The extravagant lifestyle of some celebrities has led many to believe that wealth is the ultimate goal.
2. Superficial (ˌsuːpərˈfɪʃəl)
   • Sentence: A superficial focus on appearance and material wealth can be harmful to young people’s development.
3. Perseverance (ˌpɜːsəˈvɪərəns)
   • Sentence: Perseverance is key to achieving success in any field, whether in sports, business, or the arts.
4. Accomplishment (əˈkʌmplɪʃmənt)
   • Sentence: True accomplishment comes from hard work, not from the glamour that surrounds fame.
5. Merit (ˈmɛrɪt)
   • Sentence: Success should be based on merit, rather than superficial qualities such as appearance or wealth.

Advanced Grammar Structures

1. Modal verbs of necessity (“should be taught”)
   • The modal verb “should” expresses a strong suggestion, showing the importance of educating young people about the value of hard work.
2. Complex sentence with relative clauses (“which can create unrealistic expectations”)
   • The relative clause adds important information to the sentence, enhancing the depth of the argument and improving sentence complexity.
3. Conditional sentence (“if young people are taught to value dedication, they will be less likely to idolize superficial qualities”)
   • This structure highlights a cause-and-effect relationship, showing that education can mitigate negative influences.
4. Contrastive structures with conjunctions (“On the other hand, celebrities’ success can inspire young people”)
   • The use of “on the other hand” introduces the opposing view, which is necessary for a balanced argument.
5. Nominalization (“the focus on superficial qualities”)
   • Nominalization turns a verb into a noun, allowing for more formal and concise expression, which contributes to a higher band score.

Writing Format and Band 9 Criteria

1. Task Response: The essay fully addresses the question by discussing both views and presenting a clear opinion. The points are relevant and well-supported with examples.
2. Coherence and Cohesion: The essay is logically organized with clear paragraphs. Transition phrases (e.g., “On the other hand,” “In conclusion”) help ensure a smooth flow of ideas.
3. Lexical Resource: The use of advanced vocabulary such as “extravagant,” “perseverance,” and “merit” demonstrates a high level of lexical proficiency.
4. Grammatical Range and Accuracy: The essay features a variety of complex sentence structures, including relative clauses, conditional sentences, and modal verbs, contributing to a high level of grammatical accuracy.
5. Formal Tone: The tone is formal and academic, which is appropriate for IELTS Writing Task 2. The vocabulary and structure are sophisticated yet clear.

By adhering to these criteria, this essay meets the requirements for a Band 9 score, with well-structured arguments, clear and varied vocabulary, and complex grammatical usage.

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