IELTS Band 9 Essay About traditional ideas from older people are not helpful to young people
Here we take a look at a band 9 ielts writing task 2 sample about “Traditional ideas from older people are not helpful to young people”. This sample then will be further analyzed for its vocabulary, grammar and format, so we see how it has qualified for such band score. We also suggest over 100 band 9 IELTS sample released in 2024.
General Explanation about traditional ideas from older people are not helpful to young people
Traditional ideas from older generations often emphasize values like hard work, respect, and community. However, critics argue that some of these ideas are outdated in today’s rapidly evolving society, where innovation and individualism are essential. For instance, rigid views on careers or behavior may clash with modern opportunities, like unconventional jobs or global perspectives. Nonetheless, many of these values, such as perseverance and integrity, remain timeless and provide a foundation for success. Whether these ideas are helpful depends on how well they are adapted to suit the modern world, blending tradition with progress for young people’s futures.
Band 9 Sample Answer
Traditional ideas from older people about the way to live and behave are not helpful to young people and their futures.
To what extent do you agree or disagree?
While some argue that traditional ideas passed down by older generations are no longer relevant in today’s rapidly evolving society, I believe many of these values remain invaluable when adapted to modern contexts. Although some outdated beliefs may hinder progress, principles like discipline, respect, and resilience continue to serve as cornerstones for success in young people’s lives and futures.
Firstly, older generations often emphasize values such as hard work, responsibility, and perseverance. These are fundamental traits that remain crucial in achieving personal and professional goals. For instance, regardless of technological advancements or shifting workplace dynamics, an individual who demonstrates resilience in the face of failure or difficulty is far more likely to succeed. Such principles provide young people with stability and a sense of purpose in an increasingly competitive world.
However, it is undeniable that certain traditional views have become obsolete. For example, older generations may prioritize stability over innovation, often encouraging young people to pursue conventional career paths, such as medicine or law, while dismissing newer opportunities like entrepreneurship or creative industries. This mindset can restrict individuals from realizing their potential in diverse, modern fields. Therefore, young people must critically assess which traditional ideas align with their ambitions rather than adhering to them blindly.
Furthermore, values like respect for elders, honesty, and community orientation remain vital for creating a well-rounded society. In a time when individualism and materialism dominate, these traditional principles encourage harmony and foster relationships, which contribute to emotional well-being. By balancing these values with forward-thinking attitudes, young people can maintain a sense of identity while embracing progress.
In conclusion, while some traditional ideas may no longer apply to the modern world, many core values instilled by older generations are still immensely beneficial. The key lies in adapting these values to meet the demands of contemporary society, allowing young people to retain timeless principles while pursuing innovation and growth. Thus, tradition and modernity can coexist harmoniously, providing young individuals with a solid foundation for their futures.
Selected Academic Words about Traditional ideas from older people
- Resilience (/rɪˈzɪl.jəns/)
- Sentence: Developing resilience helps individuals overcome challenges and achieve long-term success.
- Relevant (/ˈrel.ə.vənt/)
- Sentence: While some ideas may seem outdated, others remain relevant to achieving success today.
- Materialism (/məˈtɪə.ri.əˌlɪz.əm/)
- Sentence: Modern society often prioritizes materialism over deeper values like community and relationships.
- Beneficial (/ˌben.ɪˈfɪʃ.əl/)
- Sentence: Incorporating beneficial traditional values can guide young people toward more fulfilling futures.
- Cornerstone (/ˈkɔː.nə.stəʊn/)
- Sentence: Hard work and perseverance are often regarded as cornerstones of personal success.
5 Advanced Grammar Structures and How They Contribute
- Complex Sentences with Subordination
- Example: “While some traditional ideas may no longer apply to the modern world, many core values instilled by older generations are still immensely beneficial.”
- Benefit: This structure showcases a sophisticated grasp of sentence variety, improving coherence and emphasizing contrasts.
- Relative Clauses
- Example: “These traditional principles encourage harmony and foster relationships, which contribute to emotional well-being.”
- Benefit: Relative clauses add detail and precision to ideas, enhancing clarity and academic tone.
- Parallelism
- Example: “By balancing these values with forward-thinking attitudes, young people can maintain a sense of identity while embracing progress.”
- Benefit: Parallel structures create rhythm and reinforce ideas, making the writing more impactful.
- Conditional Sentences
- Example: “If young people critically assess which traditional ideas align with their ambitions, they can benefit without being restricted.”
- Benefit: Conditionals demonstrate the writer’s ability to speculate effectively, adding depth to arguments.
- Cohesive Devices
- Example: “Firstly,” “However,” “Furthermore,” “In conclusion.”
- Benefit: Cohesive devices improve logical flow and ensure ideas are connected clearly, aiding overall cohesion.
Writing Format and Achieving Band 9
- Clear Structure:
- The essay follows a logical 4-paragraph format: introduction, body paragraphs with clear arguments, and a conclusion.
- Balanced Argument:
- Both sides of the argument are acknowledged, which demonstrates critical thinking and a nuanced perspective.
- Sophisticated Vocabulary:
- Academic words like “resilience,” “beneficial,” and “materialism” enhance lexical resource.
- Complex Grammar:
- A mix of simple, complex, and compound sentences demonstrates grammatical range and accuracy.
- Cohesion and Coherence:
- Cohesive devices and logical transitions ensure smooth flow and clarity.
By adhering to these strategies, this response meets the criteria for a Band 9 essay.
Free IELTS Sample Essays with Answers PDF
Here you can download over a 1000 sample essays in pdf written by ex ielts examiners: PDF 1 / PDF 2 / PDF 3 / PDF 4 / PDF 5
Last But Not Least!
we suggest a useful IELTS website in English for more valuable IELTS sample essays on a range of topics. Our final suggestion is our writing free correction Telegram channel where you can send your own sample for evaluation and correction by an experience IELTS tutor with over a decade of practical experience in this matter.